I am moving a such a pace that its hard to breathe. I compare my life to driving with my boyfriend, who happens to be always in a rush or fancies himself to be competing in the Daytona 500. That's how I am living. Days are a flash, weeks fly by and months fade in my internal rear view mirror. Tonight as I took my shower, I wondered why is it that my life moves at such a pace. I know for a fact that my life moves faster because I am mother and mothers are built with vortex type engines. I also know that my life is busier now that I live in NYC. NYC is not for the weak, you are propelled along by this city. However, these aren't the only reasons I feel so much part of the Human Race, we all race along because we want to be the first, the fastest, the best and the brightest. Look at our choices in the cars be drive, our computer, our phones, all our accessories.
As I stood there I contemplated what exactly is it that I am racing towards, I began to see the absolute folly in my rush. To what end am I racing? The only inevitable end that awaits all humans is death. Why are we so preoccupied in getting to the end. As my children grow older they will eventually have lives of their own and I will eventually no longer be here to share their lives with them and all my other loves. Just knowing this gives me incentive to SLOW DOWN.
I am beginning to see that in this race through life we have been given the tools to slow down. Our awe of nature, our children, our families, our pets, our passion are all YIELD and STOP signs on our way. Whenever my mind is racing, I have noticed that I feel older, older in my thoughts and older in my body. My mind is ahead of my body. Whatever I feel that is what I am. If I slow my mind down to be present to the very moment we are in I will feel and act my age. If I can slow my mind down to be present with my children, then I will feel and act like them. Slowing my speed means that I can live to see more of the race.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
As I started to read your thoughts, my mind branched off thinking about all the things that I must do before the clock strikes 12, it's almost impossible to slow down; I am always in a rush. In a rush to come to work, in a rush to go home, in a rush to eat and in a rush to get my chores at home and at work done. How can I slow down and enjoy what really matters to me?
ReplyDeleteIt’s a lesson that needs to be learned by watching my husband. As I watch Rich sit down and relax when there are a million things to be done, I feel a sense of annoyance and even a smudge of jealousy. Jealous that I am not able to sit down and have everything that I have prioritize wait for me. The truth is, I too can enjoy the simple luxuries of life if I allow myself 10 minutes to empty my mind. I have assimilated so deep into the NY culture, hustling through time square with great maneuvering skills, trying not to bump into anyone as I hustle by them. A panhandler approaches and I ignore him, because I, like most, think the panhandler needs to get a job (if it were that simple). How is it possible to be so wrapped up in my own hustle that I constantly fail to see that another human being is in need?
I will have to train myself to stop the race against myself. I will slow down to acknowledge humanity and give a warm embrace. I will slow down to watch my daughter’s ever changing curiosity and her gently smile. I will slow down to learn the art of relaxation from my husband and to enjoy the love that binds us.